Kinky Jew Hanukkah ♕

 Kinky Jew Hanukkah

The Bible is pretty kinky. There is shame, humiliation, cutting, foot washing, temple slaves, rituals, and devotions. First of all, when having a kinky Jew Hanukkah,  people can get so confused with their relationship to religion and sex. Sarah, a religious university student decided to throw a holiday Kinky Jew Hanukkah party with an erotic twist. Secondly, she learned in class that sex isn’t that taboo in Judaism. It’s relatively sex-positive, that there are even laws on how you’re supposed to have sex, and secondly, men are supposed to please their wives.

Female Orgasm is a Mitzvah in Kinky Jew Hanukkah

In other words, it is a holy obligation. This was something Sarah could get behind. Turns out that having sex on the Sabbath is best, oral sex is fine. Anal? Yeah, why not? Sex toys are great. She wants S&M? Sure. What’s wrong with S&M? There’s nothing un-kosher about it. Yee-haw – sign me up here. Meanwhile, Sarah has the apartment looking like its own festival of lights.  In the kitchen, typical Jewish treats of smoked salmon dip, lox, latkes, caviar, and champagne were in abundance.  Also, candles are lit everywhere. Sarah’s friends and fellow students were dressed in kinky boots, breasts swaying freely, chains around waists, and long blond wigs braided and worn to the sides. While, Strip dreidel was being played in one corner of the room, and dancing, wild, abandoned dancing in the middle of the room. This was a celebration of life, of new beginnings, of restoration.

Human Hanukkah Menorah is Lit in Kinky Jew Hanukkah

Close to midnight, Sarah calls out, and asks for everyone to gather around the large oak table. Sarah’s friend Jessica, naked except for a long sheer silver skirt, acting as a living menorah, proceeds to lie down on the table. Eight beautiful blue candles are placed on her naked back.  At midnight,  Sarah finally announces the lighting of the human menorah. She softly recites the Shehecheyanu, a traditional Jewish prayer.  One by one, candles are lit, using the cock shaped shamash. Jessica lies incredibly still for the next 30 minutes while we assign the next 8 days of sex acts.

Eight Kinky Sex Acts Assigned

Afterward, Sarah passes around a large blue velvet bag filled with numbered dreidels. Each kinky Jew draws one on each pass. The dreidel shows a sex act that must be completed for the next eight nights. In this game, they range from the mundane such as a blow job to walking their partner on a leash around the building in a bestiality simulation, the possibility of a threesome, or a Sissy Slut Songs.  Above all, the naughty little dreidels drawn will be completed each night and must be videotaped or photographed. Sarah is hosting the first annual Kinky Jew Hanukkah and pushing the boundaries of starting a new tradition. Moreover, the biggest Jewish Kinkster will win a large cash prize.

Sarah’s point was not to co-opt or to make light of tradition, but rather, to honor it. Most importantly, the evening was about keeping the culture and tradition alive with like-minded kinky Jews on Hanukkah.