The North Pole has been a real drag lately. The Kris Kringler dating app has gone totally bust. All the hot guys are gone since Snow Patrol sent them away. All we ladies are left with are the wee peen, sometimes-closeted, repressed lil’ elves. It fucking sucks. Don’t they know what makes the North Pole great is variety? There are a few “mehs” floating around, but they are only good for making fun of. Being one of Santa’s coveted dominatrixes, I at least get to enjoy that. Plus, I get all the gingerbread I want! I’m almost done building the gingerbread house of my dreams. The market is rough! However, if I do enough domming, my fantasy home will become a reality. That means one thing and one thing only. It’s time for Elf Penis Humiliation.
This one wasn’t as glorious as I thought it would be. His dick was actually…ok. It’s not as easy to be an abominable snow bitch when the D is acceptable. You just have to focus on how their Elvathers and Elvothers didn’t love them, and it’s probably all their fault. He was even kind of hot! I might have to just pretend he’s a politician or something for the rage to come out! Elf Penis Humiliation is usually my favorite! Maybe stomping on it will make me feel better. Oh, it definitely does! Yay! Finally, I tell him what a fucking loser he is, but after he came, he opened the Elfify app and played a song from his band. Goddamnit, if they weren’t chilling me to my icy core. Maybe I’ll just fuck him and pretend it’s terrible. Yeah, that will do it!
Is that a dick or a bean? Who the fuck can tell? Well, there is no opening aside from his candy cane shoot, so I guess it’s a dick! It’s even got a little bend in it. Crooked and tiny, fantastic combo for the extreme, mean, below-zero, QUEEN. Is he, it, she wearing makeup? We all know when a dude is wearing eyeliner. Let’s not pretend, guys. And maybe some rouge to boot? I’LL CRUSH YOU, YOU PATHETIC LITTLE PETER PAN WANNABE. NOW GO SIT ON A SHELF, YOU DUMB BITCH. There. That’s better. I feel like I just ran a marathon and then sat in a sauna with a nice frosty marg. Oh, the glory! And I’m that much closer to my dream gingerbread house! THANKS BITCH TITS MCGEE!
Ugh, one of the mega-rich nerd Elves that has chronic Muahahahaha laugh. However, I can take it. First, I’ll be sure to make it the best experience possible. After, I’ll sneak into his under-igloo lair. I just know that place is up to its eyeballs in fudge and marshmallows. If my gingerbread house doesn’t work out, I can always blackmail him for everything he’s got! Or… I can skip the Fem-Dom and just get pregnant! Then I can have A LOT OF GINGERBREAD. Moreover, I’ll have five golden rings, four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, AND a Benz! In any case, it seems like I wouldn’t be the first to think of this brill plan. In the meantime, I’ll give him a good kicking. After all, he fucking deserves it, hee hee. Enjoy fantasy? Dare to share? Check out last week’s entry, Blackout Wednesday Night.
So then, want to be my Elvish little punching bag?
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Megan is extremely open minded. Plays along with even the most taboo fantasies. Close your eyes and enjoy!
Jamie has gotten insanely popular, so she is often “busy” or “offline,” but a call with her is well worth the wait. Sweet, attentive, and often funny as well as dirty, she has raised my fantasy role-play into something hotter than I ever imagined it could be.
Paris is incredible! She has such a sexy voice and an open mind.
My first call with Dixie was so fantastic! Unbelievable voice! So soft, so sweet, so nurturing, so Southern! Dixie is everything I ever wanted in a Southern lady. Her voice will leave you shaking and breathless as she weaves her Southern charm and teasing into your mind. Dixie is the one I have waited for my whole life! Five big stars for this sweet, classy Southern lady who touched something very deep within me. I LOVE Miss Dixie! The Southern Belle of my dreams!
Brittany is the best! She remembers and always engages. Others sometimes guide the call through a generic script and don’t really listen. Brittany ALWAYS shows up and makes you feel like you’re special and important!
Brittany knows exactly how to get me as turned on as physically possible. She is amazing.
I have been calling PSK for well over 10 years. This was my first call with Skye and she was amazing. She is beautiful and her voice is so sexy. I laid some frame work for a nurse role play and Skye took it from there. I will be back every 2 weeks for my follow up appointments and physical therapy. Thank you, Skye.
I just finished my second call with Skye, and she is such a sweetheart. She’s easy to talk to and made me feel very comfortable. I’m very much looking forward to talking with her again.
Jesse is incredible, a true professional!! I love talking with her.
Yesterday I was honored again to be in Aileen’s presence. What an amazing call. We touched on the 10 tenants of Aileenism that I have written for Her. Call Her and perhaps She will share them with you. I love ❤️ and worship Aileen. As it says in Aileen’s Holy Scripture chapter 13 verse 15: Though She slay me yet will I trust in Her.
Roxy is awesome, especially if you like to roleplay. You will not be disappointed when you call her. Her oral skills are insane. She likes to blow more than your mind.
I can’t say enough good things about Raven. From her sexy voice to her storytelling skills, she’s outstanding. She definitely pays attention and follows along in roleplay. Definitely one of the best.
