I started smoking when I was 18 years old. My boyfriend at the time smoked Marlboro reds – I coughed the first time he kissed me after smoking. He started offering me some of his cigarettes and when I finally said yes, I found out he had a sexy smoking fetish. And I found out I’d had a sexy smoking fetish from the first time I saw Ava Gardner in The Killers. My fetish got even stronger when I found out in college that old black and white movies often use cigarettes as a euphemism for sex. If the two stars were standing close together and one of them lit the other’s cigarette, it was the director winking at the audience that these two totally just fucked.
Not everyone’s a fan though. I’ve had boyfriends who were absolutely grossed out by smoking but girlfriends who’d want me to ironically lite one up after fucking. Naked and sweaty, I’d climb on top of her and blow smoke into her mouth – the same mouth that just ate the shit out of my pussy. But like Mark Twain said – smoking’s the easiest habit in the world to quit; I’ve done it hundreds of times. And while that may be true about lighting up a cigarette to smoke outside a bar with friends, it wasn’t true for a sexy smoking fetish. My sexy smoking fetish.
The first time I went to Europe, I was delighted to find that everyone smoked – and smoked everywhere. I couldn’t grab a pack of my cancer sticks fast enough. The best part, though, was the women blowing their sexy as fuck smoke. Lying out topless on the beach, tan, oiled up. Blowing smoke out of their fuckable pouty mouths. I still think about it sometimes when I masturbate. Watching the smoke cascade upwards around their tits and faces. Nothing makes me want to fuck the shit out of another girl’s face like my sexy smoking fetish. Especially European girls. There’s also something extra special about fucking a fellow smoker. Because you share such a dirty habit that is almost universally condemned. Yum.
Most recently, my sexy smoking fetish rescued me from heartache. Finn and I had been together for two years. We were crazy about each other. Like, can’t not be touching each other every minute of every day. Built like Adam Driver, he’d pick me up and throw me over his shoulder. And no matter where we were, he’d carry me off and tease me with his huge mushroom head. The teasing never lasted long, though, because my pussy was so soaking wet, his head would just slip in and Jesus. I always came so hard all on his perfect 9” dick. But Finn’s kind of a health nut. Overhydrating and cycling at 4:00AM. Naturally, he hated my smoking – and did not share my sexy smoking fetish. It was easy to give up/ ignore because I was so crazy about him, and eventually, madly in love with him.
Which is why my world turned upside down when he broke up with me. I still don’t know exactly why he did it but my guess is it has something to do with my dark feminine energy. It didn’t fit his upper class, affluent world. It was a month before I was ready to fuck another person. I tried fucking a few different guys over a few different weeks but all I could think about was Finn’s huge mushroom head. Then, one magical day, I started streaming one of those old black and white films – of course, starring Ava Gardner. Within seconds, I knew exactly what I needed to rid myself of every memory of Finn’s dick.
I walked down to a local bar and as if ordained by the holy whore and Madonna mother herself, there was a delectable woman smoking outside. Smoke cascading upward around her tits and face. I took her home and goddamn, she ate my pussy so fucking good, I squirted. Sexy smoking fetish to the rescue indeed.
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