Exploring bisexuality is a deeply personal and transformative experience. In this blog, we will explore the journey of discovering bisexuality, delving into the emotions, self-discovery, and acceptance that come with embracing this diverse and fluid identity. Join me as we navigate the twists and turns of this remarkable journey.
The first time I kissed a girl was at Girl Scout camp when I was 14 years old. Girl Scout camp, of all places! She was a short, blonde-haired girl named Amelia who I pecked on the lips in a moment of teenage experimentation. This was my time to explore my bisexuality. I kissed her again in the parking lot in front of my rather prudish mother who stood by, ready to load me up into our minivan. In my periphery, I could see her eyes widen and her face scrunch in disgust. “Let’s go,” she said curtly.
After exploring bisexuality by kissing Amelia, I returned home and started my sophomore year of high school. I didn’t head through the doors of my small-town school and proudly proclaim that I was contemplating my bisexuality and possibly being a lesbian. A kiss was just a kiss, and a peck was my version of “we’ll see.” My parents were sexual beings by my estimation. I once found more condoms than any man could possibly need in my father’s dresser. They never spoke of the big “it” out loud. The Internet came of age, just as I did. Instead of having “the talk” with my parents, I learned about exploring bisexuality via the World Wide Web. Thanks to Google, I learned about orgasms and the purpose of a clitoris.
From September to June, I admired the boys in my grade and was quickly rebuffed. It seemed I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, popular enough for them. I simply wasn’t enough at all. In July, I officially switched to the other team, so to speak. Nothing serious, mind you, just casual flirtation. A willingness to be open and affectionate with women. But it was Girl Scout camp where my curiosity about women, exploring bisexuality, and sexual orientation first piqued. It was where I learned to appreciate women as leaders.
I envied these women because they were able explore their bisexuality. From my teenage vantage point; had been able to forge a path of acceptance in myself and those around them. The women I met were creative, talented, and kind. They often wore their heart on their sleeves. These weren’t the girls I was forced to be around in my high school. For nine months of the year; these were women. Real women. They weren’t mean or haughty, but adventurous and clever. These were the type of women I hoped to become. Completely comfortable with their bisexuality.
Years later, I stood in the bathroom of my apartment. My girlfriend at the time, Lyla, was taking a bath. I knew she had been dying for one, so I surprised her with a Lush bath bomb. I swirled the water around with my hand and asked how she liked it before receiving a kiss. Not a peck, not experimentation, but a full-on plant where she grabbed my face with her wet hands. I got up from the edge of the tub and started to undress myself and prepare for bed. I no longer had to explore with bisexuality. We had sex the night before; some of the best sex I’ve ever had. She fell asleep wrapped around me so that I could feel her chest on my back.
I’m bisexual. For far too long, that was something I was reluctant to admit. Bisexuality was a way for me to explore. Once upon a time, my parents sent me off to Girl Scout camp. I was imparted with a healthy dose of independence, and, more importantly, an ability to finally find women with whom I could form a bond.
Check out my first blog: Shopping For His First Pair of Panties
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