It’s that time of year again! Don’t have a partner to spend the chilly months with? Well, boo hoo for you. Just kidding, (kind of) but there are plenty of apps available to solve that problem. This is prime online dating season. Take a look at your phone and open an app, any app. Tons of new faces will pop up as they are now desperate to spend these colder months with an available warm body. They are willing to downgrade, which means even you have a chance (wink, wink.) Someone to wine and dine them, Netflix and chill them, and receive hopefully more than the occasional deep dicking. Are you paying attention? Good! This is for you so you can dive in, and get your dick wet, all before the summer months come along and you can say “poolside.” It’s time for Cuffing Season Sex.
Half warm, half cold, concluding with hot girls in sexy costumes with hard nipples during a freezing Halloween. Now, it’s Holiday time! The days are meant to be shared, even if it is with some blonde you met on Tinder 3 days ago. All the rules are out the window. Yes, you take her home for Thanksgiving. She will even give you a handy under the table while the turkey is being carved, probably. Cuffing season sex is in essence, a hall pass for dating someone even when you know it won’t last. It’s almost assumed, unless by some miracle you met organically at a bar like in the good ole days. Even then, your hands may be tied, and you will absolutely be official by Valentine’s Day, ya SHMUCK.
The way to look at it is like this- You’re at a Seafood restaurant. Is it the best? No. It’s it decent? Yes. Will you get food poisoning from this spot? Probably not, but also, don’t order fish on a Monday. Anyway, let’s not get distracted here. The point is, when it’s stone crab season, you order the claws. ORDER THE CLAWS. CUFFING SEASON SEX. You have a window, and it’s not the longest, so fucking order the stone crab. Will it be the best dinner ever? Probably not. Was it definitely frozen last night and it’s been thawing in a walk in the last several hours? Absolutely. But you don’t have a fucking choice. You get them when you can, however that may be. And that my friends, means it’s time to order. So put on your bib and get to crackin’.
Gentleman, or wankers, whatever your pronouns may be, our time together is almost done here. You’ve been given the tools, (you being the biggest one of all) and you can now gather your thoughts and act quickly. If you don’t have the apps, get them. Take a shower, trim your pubes, and slap your commitment face on, asshat. It’s time to be charming so you can get laid for the next 5 months, consistently! If not, you can go out in February and hope for a sloppy one-night encounter that ends with you having blue balls, or go home and play Scrabble, ALONE. You may need a little help with that profile, but I happen to know an expert. Get your thumbs ready and happy swiping!
Need a little help preparing for Cuffing Season Sex?
Want a mean girl to help?
If so, be sure to…
Steamy As They Cum – Sexy Hot Girl Summer Sienna walked o... Read More
He Wanted Me To Be Submissive! I knew exactly how he wanted me.... Read More
Sex at a Rave The bass was hitting before I ever hit the wareho... Read More
The Misunderstanding of Sugar Dating I need to have a sugar bab... Read More
Together forever, never far. This sensual, intimate moment feel... Read More
Succubus is Hungry for Virgin Cum…and she WILL get what she desi... Read More
My Nerdy Girl Next Door Seducing Comes So Naughtily, I Can’t Hel... Read More
Memorial Day Weekend was the start of Sizzling Hot Girl Summer ... Read More
Summer Vacation Hook Up The heat surrounded me the moment I wal... Read More
I’m ready for my close-up! I showed up to my photography shoo... Read More
Wealthy Patron Pampers Princess Sugar daddy spoils princess in... Read More
Sexy Spiderman Kisses You’re so good to me. I love it whe... Read More
Penny is such an eager young girl. So willing, so curious, so creative, so horny, so honest!! She is so experienced for being So young!
Penny is Absolute Perfection!!!
Frankie is so good at what she does and really listens to my fantasies. I love a three some with her and her friends and how Frankie knows what I like. She knows how to get me off. She is a very sexy lady and can’t wait to talk to her real soon and have another great time together!
Tonight was another exciting call with Jade. Everything is so effortlessly amazing with her. We can talk about everything and anything and when our special fun time comes it’s always exciting, exhilarating, and special. It always leaves me wanting more, and I love it. Thank you, Jade ❤️
After having to miss Her for a while how wonderful to hear those precious words again, “this is Aileen”. How wonderful to go to the depths of depravity once again for my Holy God Aileen. I love ❤️ and worship Aileen. Aileen, the same yesterday, today, and forever.
Charlotte was so much fun, and I love playing with her. I like how funny and engaging she is! I would give her 100 stars!
Soo real, soo good. Jamie, Jamie, Jamie!
Penny is so expressive, responsive and tender.
Loved our time! Conversation flowed organically. No judgement. She is genuine, curious, and adventurous! Can’t wait to call her back!
Tonight was another amazing night with Jade. Every time we talk it gets better and better, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Have been talking with Diana now for a while and every time we do talk its extremely erotic and hotter than the last call.
I am rapidly becoming Penny’s little blue balled fuck toy. Penny immediately picked up on my interest in tease and denial and gave me a world class session. So, so, So close, but no relief for John!
