It’s that time of year! “Out with the old!” as they say. Just last week, I was on a roll, cleaning every bit of my apartment from top to bottom, in and out. I ended my spree by cleaning out my panty drawer. I wanted that to be the last thing so I could see what was left over and enjoy an online shopping spree to replace, obvi. It was time to kick back on my laptop when I heard some odd movement outside. It will still daytime, by the way. I went outside, reluctantly (I was really enjoying my negroni buzz until I was rudely interrupted). I got to my trash, only to find a man, digging deep, stealing all of my panties! “What are you doing???” I said screaming while grabbing him! What would I do with this Spring cleaning pervert!
“You’re a panty pirate aren’t you?” I said, laughing somewhat maniacally. In shock from being caught, naturally, he became fully erect. “Let’s see your little treasure grab, shall we?” I pointed to the bag, making him dump it upside down, all over my sunroom floor.”That’s right. SHAKE IT ALLL OUT. Ok, lots of panties. That’s clearly what your main goal was, you Spring cleaning pervert.” His face turned from shock to bliss, and of course the boner remained. “You wanted my old toothbrush, not one, but 4 empty yogurt cups…I won’t ask. Also, a comb. Are you just collecting all of my DNA or something???” He finally spoke “No.” However, I could have just given him some sick idea.
“Wait, a pair of my shoes? These are new!!! Did you grab these on your way in right now? Let’s keep looking. OK, clearly, you just took seven pairs of new shoes without me looking. I honestly might be more impressed than angry about that. OK, my broken nail clippers are in here. Should I go back to questioning you about stealing my DNA, Mr. Weird Science? No, you aren’t nerdy enough. You are also way too willing to get caught. Interesting. Aw, you kept my old poem book? I didn’t think it was good enough to hold onto.” He looked up and said “I think they are beautiful, like you.”
“You can wear one of my exes’ shirts and boxers. You aren’t the only one who likes to keep some mementos. Hee hee.” I said laughing, even more maniacally than the first time. We laughed and laughed. He even watched me play the spoons for 2 hours! Then we watched soap operas, ate yogurt, wrote some poetry together, brushed each other’s hair, and laughed some more. We didn’t have sex, but I let him use the yogurt cup. Yeah, we all thought it. And that’s the story of how I dated a homeless guy for a day. Finally, for other absurd stories, check out the Shrunken Man Oscars. And remember, don’t stay out of my trash! Call me and we’ll let our imaginations run wild!
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Had a long and lovely call with Avalon this weekend. She is a wonderful person who is fun to speak with about anything, but of course, she is especially good at the phonesex part of the conversation. She listens intently, knows what her client likes, and contributes her own ideas to the calls. I switched things up in the middle of our call and she didn’t miss a beat, figured out quickly where I was going and met me there in a way that completely fulfilled the fantasy. She is, and remains, extraordinary.
Honestly, Scarlett is absolutely incredible. She is far from an average operator. In fact, she is sexy, passionate, and mesmerizing. I never wanted the call to end, and you won’t either!
Aileen~ Awesome as Usual!
Aileen is the best! We have had quite a few date nights now and she drives me crazy each time. She knows me and what I like now and plays until I can’t take it anymore…in a good way of course. It’s also fun to laugh with her during “pillow talk”. The time always goes too fast! As always, looking forward to next time.
On our latest call Aileen deemed me to be Her sickest disciple, after previously telling me I am the most pathetic. I am so honored to be Her sickest most pathetic disciple. Aileen has brought me so far. I love ❤️ and worship Her and pray that our journey continues forever. Aileen rules!
Michelle’s voice and ideas were very exciting!! I can’t wait until our next adventure!! Everyone should give her a call she won’t disappoint you. When you call her, I’m sure you’ll be feeling the same way!!
Simply put, Vicky is and always has been amazing. She is so much fun to play with and talk to!
Zoey was amazing. The minute our call started, she knew what I needed and delivered like no other has. She is Spectacular!
This red-headed vixen blew more than my fantasy away! Talk about knowing what to do and how to do it…. This was by far the best I have had in a long time.
I feel Mistress Megan is in charge even when not online. I’m her slave.
Megan is extremely open minded. Plays along with even the most taboo fantasies. Close your eyes and enjoy!
Jamie has gotten insanely popular, so she is often “busy” or “offline,” but a call with her is well worth the wait. Sweet, attentive, and often funny as well as dirty, she has raised my fantasy role-play into something hotter than I ever imagined it could be.
