It’s that time of year! “Out with the old!” as they say. Just last week, I was on a roll, cleaning every bit of my apartment from top to bottom, in and out. I ended my spree by cleaning out my panty drawer. I wanted that to be the last thing so I could see what was left over and enjoy an online shopping spree to replace, obvi. It was time to kick back on my laptop when I heard some odd movement outside. It will still daytime, by the way. I went outside, reluctantly (I was really enjoying my negroni buzz until I was rudely interrupted). I got to my trash, only to find a man, digging deep, stealing all of my panties! “What are you doing???” I said screaming while grabbing him! What would I do with this Spring cleaning pervert!
“You’re a panty pirate aren’t you?” I said, laughing somewhat maniacally. In shock from being caught, naturally, he became fully erect. “Let’s see your little treasure grab, shall we?” I pointed to the bag, making him dump it upside down, all over my sunroom floor.”That’s right. SHAKE IT ALLL OUT. Ok, lots of panties. That’s clearly what your main goal was, you Spring cleaning pervert.” His face turned from shock to bliss, and of course the boner remained. “You wanted my old toothbrush, not one, but 4 empty yogurt cups…I won’t ask. Also, a comb. Are you just collecting all of my DNA or something???” He finally spoke “No.” However, I could have just given him some sick idea.
“Wait, a pair of my shoes? These are new!!! Did you grab these on your way in right now? Let’s keep looking. OK, clearly, you just took seven pairs of new shoes without me looking. I honestly might be more impressed than angry about that. OK, my broken nail clippers are in here. Should I go back to questioning you about stealing my DNA, Mr. Weird Science? No, you aren’t nerdy enough. You are also way too willing to get caught. Interesting. Aw, you kept my old poem book? I didn’t think it was good enough to hold onto.” He looked up and said “I think they are beautiful, like you.”
“You can wear one of my exes’ shirts and boxers. You aren’t the only one who likes to keep some mementos. Hee hee.” I said laughing, even more maniacally than the first time. We laughed and laughed. He even watched me play the spoons for 2 hours! Then we watched soap operas, ate yogurt, wrote some poetry together, brushed each other’s hair, and laughed some more. We didn’t have sex, but I let him use the yogurt cup. Yeah, we all thought it. And that’s the story of how I dated a homeless guy for a day. Finally, for other absurd stories, check out the Shrunken Man Oscars. And remember, don’t stay out of my trash! Call me and we’ll let our imaginations run wild!
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Scarlett is absolutely AMAZING! Her verbal and intellectual skills are unsurpassed! She takes my fantasy and runs with it! She makes it come alive! She is simply the BEST! HIGHLY SATISFIED AND RECOMMENDED!
Valerie was beyond amazing!! She may be new here but she definitely is not new to this world. She has taken me to heights of ecstasy that I have been only taken a handful of times. She is sensual, adorable, cock-draining!! If I could give more stars I surely would!! Definitely will call back for sure……omfg and her role play skills are unheard of!!
It’s not the start of new month without having a one-on-one conversation with Mistress Aileen. She gets the nastiest things out of me and once I explode I am thinking about what we will talk about on the next call. Thinking about it now has me wanting to get off with her soon.
Real. That’s the word I would describe this particular operator. Authentic and real. If you are a gentleman that likes to partake in phone sex you know exactly what I mean by that statement. She’s the real deal. And this isn’t just a job to her. This isn’t just about money to her. When you speak to her, you can tell she actually enjoys it. She’s really into it. That’s a rare find that’s a rare gem. If you don’t do a call with Jade, you’re wasting your money. She really is the best. And she deserves a raise.
Roxy totally humiliated me. She made me feel like such a little beta sissy. She made my tiny dick cum really hard.
Tiffany is amazing and able to put together a fantasy and role play that fits your needs quickly and thoroughly! I had an incredible experience and highly recommend her for dominant role play and stocking or pantyhose fetish role play. Can’t wait to call her again.
Sage’s voice engulfs your mind and soon has your entire body twitching and squirming. Total cardio workout without the trip to the gym. Wow!
Joey is WONDERFULNESS personified! She’s so sweet & compassionate. And her Sexiness is unmatched. Hearing her voice brings out the Wild & SAVAGE in me! It really is an HONOR talking to Joey.
Experimented with something new during my most recent call with Vicky. She made the experience as sexy, enjoyable, and naughty as I hoped it would be. She continues to push my limits on every call.
Paris owns me and I love it. So much fun to have a goddess to worship and submit to. With her sexy voice and beautiful photos she will pull you in and not let go!
Sage is beyond incredible. For as ravishingly and unbelievably beautiful as she is, she took every one of my perverted scenarios to new levels. If you haven’t yet called her, do it now. You won’t regret it.
CJ is the perfect woman for me and I will always love her no matter the distance between us. She and I have an absolute chemistry when we are together. Love You CJ!! 💘❤️🥰😘
