MICROPENIS REVEAL HUMILIATION

I would have never guessed my Florida vacation would include micropenis reveal humiliation.

For the next couple of weeks, I’ll be road-tripping to Florida with a friend to visit his mother — and her common-law husband, who amused us all with his micropenis reveal humiliation during our last stay! What’s hilarious to me (and even ironic, I guess) is that Phil looks like a penis. He’s short, stubby, bald . . . and just one of those red-faced fucks (whether he’s drunk or being a “dry drunk,” i.e. a prick even when he’s sober) that physically RESEMBLES a cock. I’m quite the extrovert and beyond charming, so I can schmooze with anyone just fine. I could tell what kind of “man” he was during the first 5 seconds of him hugging me instead of shaking my hand: a limp, little-dicked LOSER.

Before his micropenis reveal humiliation, Mr. Microdick started his unoriginal chivalry routine by buying me a drink.

I accepted his predictable offer mostly out of politeness. I mean hey, maybe I was being “quick to judgment,” right? Ha. My ability to read a room (and specific people) is usually beyond acute. But whatever, if this fat bald fuck wants to buy me drinks, sure. Why not? I can only imagine it makes him feel “more manly.” He was compensating for something, after all, as we would ALL soon learn! He wanted to buy me and my (platonic male, and as I call him: mutual beard) friend what he was having. And he was having some fruity rum something-or-other. When in Rome, right? I couldn’t help but laugh in my head as I took the first oh-so saccharine sip.

“How is it? You like it?” he asked, clamoring pathetically before I’d even finished downing the first gulp.

“It’s great, Phil. Just great. I love it.” I smiled sweetly, but of course, not quite as sweet as that girl drink he’d insisted on buying me. What kind of “man” gets drunk on daiquiris? I exchanged a wry grin with my friend. Although his lack of size was shocking, it didn’t entirely surprise me that the night ended in a micropenis reveal humiliation.

The man with the smallest cock always talks the loudest and is the most obnoxious.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this (il)logic out. And it never fails to NOT impress me. The louder a man talks, the MORE a man (has the nerve) to speak, the less impressed I become. So. Fucking. Boring. I always say, “the best men speak when spoken to.” Apparently, Mr. Microdick never learned this lesson. He didn’t seem to have learned much of anything, I noticed, the more he opened his ugly cocksucker mouth. As he got drunk enough to pass out, I anticipated what I hoped would be a micropenis reveal humiliation to teach him SOMETHING, at least!

Finally, we went home from the bar and it was time to tuck Mr. Microdick into bed. He continued to blather on so annoyingly that I finally responded (when I could actually get a word in edgewise):

“Well, Phil, I don’t really like to listen to men’s voices in my spare time.”

He gasped, and from behind him my friend quickly pantsed him. I had to squint to even see it was a “cock.”

My friend’s mother and I laughed SO hard that we fell out of our chairs. I exclaimed to my friend, “See, I always told you your mom was a lesbian!” We just could NOT stop laughing. Eventually, Mr. Microdick ran into the bedroom in tears, apparently not as tickled by his micropenis reveal humiliation as everyone else was. Poor “man,” right? I hope when we get there this year he has some cuckold husband confessions to entertain me. There’s only so much amusement even the smallest microdick can offer — and his was QUITE small.

Do you have a microdick? Do you need a micropenis reveal humiliation phone sex call? Good. I’m right here. Pick up the phone NOW. What are you waiting for, you little dicked IDIOT?!?!

Call Aileen 1-888-792-6198